Good Bear/Bad Bear
In the High Performance Leadership workshops I have conducted for literally thousands of people and hundreds more in Executive Coaching there is a certain part of instruction where I stop and ask, “How many of you know that you are overly self-critical?”
It is amazing to me that almost everyone raises their hand! I want to criticize them for doing that but as you’ve probably guessed, they have already criticized themselves for criticizing themselves!
If you can identify and relate to this, let me take a moment of your time to interrupt this destructive behavior.
First question – “Why would you(they)do this?”
ANSWER: Belief and Habit.
- HABIT – From the time that we were very small we learned about criticism. Experts say that little babies don’t even understand the concepts of “RIGHT” and “WRONG”. However, we soon learn from parents, school, religion, television, etc.
- BELIEF – “If I am self-critical I will improve and get better” Really? If that were true, we would be amazing by now. It doesn’t seem like self-criticism is really working.
Second Question – “If you treated other people as harshly as you treat yourself, would you have any friends?” NO! I catch myself calling myself “stupid” lots of times. Imagine if I called my friends and co-workers “stupid”.
Therefore, it seems obvious that what is really “stupid” is doing the same thing over and over again, even though it doesn’t really work.
Have I interrupted you? Have you stopped and thought about your habit and belief?
If so, you’re most likely wondering what you can do instead. You’re smart enough to know that it won’t work to ignore results so what’s the alternative?
As you see from the Good Bear/Bad Bear video that is connected to this blog – BALANCE
A friend of mine often tells groups of people when doing public speaking – Every athletic field and basketball gym has one thing in common – A SCOREBOARD. It allows teams to evaluate, adjust and improve as they attempt to win.
Please watch the video above, bears seem smarter than we are.
